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  • Bill Chastain

TOYS AND GAMES: At the Bar… Buzzed but Alert

Patti and I were at the Irish 31 bar on Saturday watching the Final Four semi-final between Oklahoma and Villanova when she locked in on a couple sitting by the window. Her well-honed people-watching skills told her they were on a first date arranged by a computer dating service.

Patti: “Look at him. He’s trying too hard. He’s drinking iced tea and acting like he’s listening to what she’s saying, but he wants to watch the game. He’s in hell.”

Meanwhile, I couldn’t help being distracted by a young man and his girlfriend sitting next to us at the bar.

In front of him sat a half-full Guinness, a can of Red Bull, and an empty shot glass — a living, breathing BUZZED BUT ALERT poster. She drank Chardonnay. In between video games on an iPhone, they kissed as if sprawled in the backseat of a station wagon parked at a desolate beach. Only the windows weren’t fogged and this beach was public. Oh how I wanted to ask if I could be of assistance: “Per chance, may I donate some Marriott points?”

What the hell, the kids were faring better than Buddy Hield and the Sooners.

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