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  • Bill Chastain

TOYS AND GAMES: Bayshore, Reverting to the Primitive, and Banana Peels

While pedaling along Bayshore Boulevard, I learned the hard way what it must feel like to be a dog.

Turns out, I ride with my mouth wide open, like a Labrador hanging from the passenger-side window with tongue flapping in the breeze.

Carefree and enjoying my ride, I felt something hit the back of my throat. After a panicked moment in which I worried about what I might have ingested, I managed to hock up a large horse fly. Some days you’re the dog, some days you’re the fly? Alas, that experience couldn’t ruin the day. Like many rides along the “world’s longest continuous sidewalk” I looked into the water to see dolphins. How many places can you go to see a live dolphin show on a daily basis?

I did feel disappointment when the police officer on a motorcycle pointed at me — I’m going that fast? — only to pull over the red Camry.

Home alone for the weekend while Patti spent a few days in Charleston, I reverted to the primitive. That included making a big pot of chili — good for five meals, stocked the fridge with cool ones, and turned down the air to a temperature suitable for hanging meat. Nice to know my survive instincts remain in tact.

Banana_Peel “Banana Peel” by Max Ronnersjö

A gentleman moping a bathroom floor recently warned me about slipping. That prompted me to ask if he’d ever seen anybody slip on a banana peel. He had not. Nor had I. So we shared a moment wondering if anybody — save for cartoon characters or members of the Three Stooges — ever slipped on a banana peel. Deep conversation, huh?

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