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  • Bill Chastain

Up in the Press Box

You might be disrespecting sportswriters, as Jimmy Conway would say, “a little bit,” if you buy into the prevailing stereotype that they are jock-sniffing, insensitive creatures, one brownie crumb from three bills.

Since I can’t go off on Billy Batts, I’ll defend “hacks” everywhere by offering a recent press box conversation as proof of the enlightened state of the group.

Christopher_Columbus “Christopher Columbus” by Sebastiano del Piombo

After a veteran scribe posed the question, “who is your favorite explorer?” A colleague shot back Vasco da Gama. Shortly thereafter came a Ponce de León, a Christopher Columbus, and an Amerigo Vespucci.

Discussions of the most underrated explorer, the most overrated, and, of course, a Top 10 list followed.

Neil Armstrong’s name eventually trickled in, as did the tandem of Lewis and Clark, though the more contemporary nominations were disqualified based on the grounds you had to have worn a hat with a plume in order to be considered.

Elevated thinking, huh?

You might have had too much to drink if…

You were the Arkansas fan who tried to catch a home run ball during Thursday’s SEC match-up with LSU. Once Tigers shortstop Alex Bergman’s blast cleared the fence, this Arkansas fan tried to make the grab — with his visor!

Needless to say, the ball eluded him.

What would you do for a hamburger?

Never turn away a free meal, right? Well, Ottawa Senators forward Curtis Lazar might have taken that philosophy a little too far.

Seems Senators fans are enamored with their goaltender, Andrew Hammond, a.k.a., “The Hamburgler.” In tribute to him, they throw hamburgers on the ice. So after the Senators’ recent defeat of the Bruins, Lazar figured why let all that good food go waste.Wimpy_TJB

Accordingly, the rookie scooped up a burger and began to dine.

Wimpy would be proud.

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